Here's something you won't see in a Reformed church--snake handling.  In the first place, most Reformed pastors I know are pretty skittish about critters (especially snakes and spiders).  Most of us believe that the "longer" ending of Mark (vv. 9-20) is probably not in the original text of that gospel.  Besides, we would be too busy debating the science of textual-criticism to actually handle a snake.   Click here: FOXNews.com - Pastor Among the Arrested in Illegal Snake Trade Crackdown - Local News | News Articles | National N

Here's another thing you won't see in a Reformed church--a "beefcake" calendar.  Most Reformed guys I know are too geeky or too old to be seen in public without a shirt.  Some of us wouldn't want to reveal our Calvin tattoos in public.   Click here: FOXNews.com - Man Who Created Calendar of Shirtless Mormon Missionaries Facing Excommunication - Local News | News

One more thing you won't see in a Reformed church is a "gun" giveaway.  Lets be clear here--it is not the church's responsibility to provide the youth with the appropriate fire-arms and training.  That is clearly a father's responsibility!   Click here: 9NEWS.com | Colorado's Online News Leader | Church cancels gun giveaway for teens

Finally, while many folk are in a dither about the FDIC's takeover of IndyMac and rising oil prices, Reformed Christians are in a dither about the sale of Anheuser-Busch to InBev and the fact that the Boston Beer Company (brewers of Sam Adams) is now the largest American-owned brewery.  Could it be that the European take-over of American breweries is tied to the rise of a revived Roman empire and will enable the future antichrist to control the masses?  How come no one is investigating this????  Where are the prophecy pundits on this one???  Click here: Brookston Beer Bulletin » Blog Archive » Samuel Adams, Biggest American Brewer

I am not Tony Rezko . . .

I've never met Tony Rezko . . .

I know nothing about Tony Rezko . . .

The resemblance is creepy . . . 

This one (from Rod) cracked me up . . .

A man was being tailgated by a stressed out woman on a busy boulevard. Suddenly, the light turned yellow, just in front of him. He did the right thing, stopping at the crosswalk -- even though he could have beaten the red light by accelerating through the intersection. The tailgating woman was furious and honked her horn, screaming in frustration as she missed her chance to get through the intersection, dropping her cell phone and makeup.

As she was still in mid-rant, she heard a tap on her window and looked up into the face of a very serious police officer. The officer ordered her to exit her car with her hands up. He took her to the police station where she was searched, fingerprinted, photographed, and placed in a holding cell. After a couple of hours, a policeman approached the cell and opened the door. She was escorted back to the booking desk where the arresting officer was waiting with her personal effects.

He said, "I'm very sorry for this mistake. You see, I pulled up behind your car while you were blowing your horn, flipping off the guy in front of you, and cussing a blue streak at him. I noticed the 'What Would Jesus Do?' bumper sticker, the 'Choose Life' license plate holder, the 'Follow Me to Sunday-School' bumper sticker, and the chrome-plated Christian fish emblem on the trunk. Naturally...I assumed you had stolen the car."
 

I never was much of a fan of Gilligan's Island.  Even as a kid, I thought the premise for the show was pretty lame.  It did have a catchy theme song, however.

All the survivors did was sit around and eat.  They never worked on their boat--well, not very hard.  In fact, they didn't even seem much interested in getting off the island.  They were always kind of just hanging around . . . like a lot of the kids I went to high school with.

The professor always had weird ideas about what he could make from coconuts.  The Howell's seemed like they had a few too many gin and tonics--although there was no booze on the island.  Something was amiss. And then there was that weird shrub that looked vaguely familiar.  

But now it all makes sense . . .  It wasn't just Bob Denver.   Click here: FOXNews.com - Mary Ann of 'Gilligan's Island' Caught With Marijuana in Car - Celebrity Gossip | Entertainment News.  The years have not been kind to Mary Ann. 

If it is time for the Riddleblog to be updated, maybe I need a make over too.

My sons (20, 17) tell me that as a middle-aged bald-guy still hanging on to my 1970's graying mustache, I look like a fireman, cop, or Iraqi soldier.

Knowing that I was thinking about doing something drastic to change my appearance, someone @ Christ Reformed decided I needed a new look.  So they supplied me with the accouterments of a proper make-over.  I tried it out when we took our pictures for the church directory because I wanted them to know how much I appreciated their generosity and thoughtfulness.

Now my sons call me "Dad Dirt" or "Dad-Bob."

Meanwhile,  after thinking it over, I think I'll stick with the Dr. Phil look.   He's bald.  He's got a "stache."  He's a big celebrity, and my wife thinks I look a bit like him.

I posted this a couple of years ago, but for some reason, it cries out to be re-posted today.

Look carefully.  What's wrong with this picture?

Bureaucrats and clip art . . . you gotta love 'em. 

Does anyone want to make any predictions for 2008?

I have a couple . . .

1).  The Republicans will retain the White House.  The reason is that poor Obama will be eaten alive by the Clinton machine during the primaries.  By the time we get to the general election in November, Hillary will have become such a caustic and polarizing figure, she'll lose.  People will vote for the Republican as a lesser of evils choice, there will be very low voter turn-out (people will be sick of it all), and no one will want the spectre of William Jefferson lurking around in Hillary's White House.  The Republican nominee (Rudy or Romney) will pick a southern conservative (Thompson?-If you can wake him up long enough to get him to run), and Hillary will pick Bill Richardson to pull New Mexico, Arizona, and Colorado out of the Republican camp.

The wild cards here . . .  Iran and terrorism, the economy, and third party-bids by Bloomberg or Paul.

2).  The big evangelical blogger discussion by May 1 will be "can a Christian vote for a pro-choice (or nominally pro-life) Republican?"  By election day, the debate will be over and it will be "ABC"--anybody but Clinton.

3).  The Yankees will win the World Series.  Yes, Boston has better pitching (although the Yankees have a better team on the field).  The reason?  The fiery new manager and the desire to win it all while the team plays its final year in Yankee Stadium will carry the day.  Also, it is very tough emotionally to repeat (You Red Sox fans need to look at how fat and happy the Yanks have been from all those victories in 1996-2001, and how they have lacked the fire in their bellies ever since).

4).  The Federal Vision controversy will shift from a debate about its basic tenets to the church courts and fairness of the proceedings.  The first defeat in a church court for any well-known FV advocate will send a bunch of folk running into the CREC.  By the way, my prediction for 2010 is that once all of the FV advocates are together in the same church body, they'll turn on each other--that will be interesting to watch. 

5).  I predict Mike Horton will publish two new books, both will be great!

6).  I'm also predicting that Ken Samples will say "umm . . ." in a lecture.  That will be a first.

OK, now its your turn.  Leave your predictions in the comments section below.