Yup, Baseball Is Better Than Golf!

This living dinosaur was chasing golfers on the green at the Kiawah Island Club's River Golf Course.  No thanks!

I Wonder If Baseball's "Siri" Will Get Tired of All the Inane Questions

Jose Siri is a Cincinnati Reds minor leaguer.  Can you imagine the grief he'll endure should his baseball career progress?

"Hey Siri, where's my glove?"

"Siri, where's the closest Starbucks?"

"Siri, what's the traffic like on my way home?"

"Hey Siri, who was the thirty-first president?"

"Siri, who won the 1975 AL MVP?"

"Siri, would you send a text to my wife?"

"Siri, you bum, why'd you strike out?"

Yup, I've Felt Like That . . . You Probably Have Too . . .

An unfortunate "typo" surely ruined someone's Lenten bulletin . . .  It is currently making its way around the internet.

This unfortunate error demonstrates two things.  For one thing, church secretaries have great power and an awesome responsibility.  I'll bet the congregation which used this bulletin snickered throughout the entire service--even one intended to be sober and reflective.

The awkward typo also contains much truth.  There are indeed days when my own level of sanctification reaches lows which can only be described as "butt dust."  The very fact that I just posted this, proves as much.

The good news is that we can laugh at our foibles all the while taking comfort in a merciful Savior who loves us.

I'm Good for a Dozen or So . . .

Yes, I know, they are supposed to be bad for you.  And I do watch my diet pretty carefully these days.  But when I cheat, it usually involves a couple of these.  544 million of these greasy delights get scarfed down every year.  We used to call them "tacoroos" before Jack cleaned up their drive-thru, and dumped the kangaroo meat.  I even remember talking to a Jack-in-the-Box when ordering!

Even the Lakers give them away when they win and hold the opponents under 100 points--rare these days.  But Laker fans chant with gusto "we want tacos" if it looks like a possibility.

Read this and then head for the closest Jack!  They are only 99 cents for two.  554 Million Tacos Annually

Does It Look Better on Him or Her?

Couldn't resist . . . (h.t. Pam Compton)

Portlandia Nails It! "Ban the Bag!"

A rather cynical commentary on over-coddled American youth!

Watch Where You Are Going

True baseball fans keep their eyes on MLB's annual winter meetings, because this is where your favorite team makes trades and signs free agents. 

The most memorable moment in these meetings occurred a few years back in Dallas, when a guest in the hotel/conference center where the meetings were being held was watching the cameras and the live broadcast in the lobby and was not paying attention to where he was going.  The result--the most often replayed clip on the MLB channel.

Pastor Buzzkill

Pastors are always more than a little apprehensive during weddings.  Why?  Because even though the couple you just married are thrilled that after months of preparation they have finally been pronounced man and wife, that moment is immortalized on film.

There in the background, behind the obvious joy of the moment, is pastor buzzkill-caught with a disapproving scowl on my face even as the newlyweds express their heart-felt joy.

I'm glad this charming couple has found humor in this photo--they teased me with it--and I'm sure they know there was nothing about that day of which even remotely I disapprove.

Here is yet another reminder that the camera catches all, including my lunch backing up, or that moment when I started to relax, or even when my thoughts began to turn to what it is that I was to do next in the ceremony.

Whatever I was thinking or digesting, here I am, pastor buzzkill in all my glory!  The moral to the story, "smile!"  Even when it hurts to smile!

And don't eat fast food in a rush before conducting a wedding . . .

So Long Overdue and Well Deserved

A great injustice has been corrected.  Japan has officially granted Godzilla Japanese citizenship.  Godzilla Now a Citizen

Although the creature entered the country illegally, and has destroyed Tokyo several times, this poor misunderstood animal's rights finally have finally recognized.

One injustice remains, however.  Godzilla must be given free veterinary care under Japan's national health care system--provided he/she/it, as the case may be, is spayed and/or neutered.

If Godzilla is trans or multi-gendered, then, of course, gender reassignment will be provided at tax-payer expense.

Godzilla has rights!

Does Bacon Trump Tulip?

(h.t. Rod Rosenbladt)