Abbott and Costello Would Love This!

(h.t. Paul Barr)

Herding Cats -- Literally

There is a small island in Japan that is overrun by cats.  The cats have inbred for so long, they all look alike.  Is it just me, or does the woman sound like the cats she's herding?  Or do the cats imitate the woman feeding them?

 

A trip here is not on my bucket list of places to visit.

No Tax Deduction for Kitty

A cat (we call her by the generic name "Kitty") has moved into my yard and claimed the Riddlebargers as her designated cat-servants.

The implied agreement is that we will feed her and provide her with proper sleeping arrangements, in exchange for vermin removal.  A classic quid pro quo.  So far so good.  She is a good hunter--I'll grant her that.

According to a recent article as to whether or not pets provide any tax relief (Tax Deductions for Pets?), it is pretty clear that keeping my current arrangement with Kitty will do nothing to lower my taxes.

Believe it or not, you can actually deduct pet expenses for five reasons--none, of course, apply to me.

1).  Is your pet used as a guide animal?  Well, the only thing to which this cat will guide me is her food.

2).  Is your pet a guard animal?  Yeah, right.  The lazy cat just stares when the opossums show up at night to eat her food.  She doesn't even hiss.  I guess she figures she's trained us to provide more food for her in the morning.

3).  If you move and incur expenses moving your pets.  Let me just say this, if I ever move, whoever buys my house needs to know that the property comes with a cat.

4).  If you participate in a pet rescue program.  Well, there would be a debate about this one.  Did the Riddlebargers rescue her, or did she claim us?  And if I have to add another cat or two to claim the deduction, well then, I won't qualify.  One cat is too many.

5).  If your pet turns into a profession.  How any one could make a significant income from a spayed feline who sleeps all day, who is indifferent most of the time to her caretakers, and who catches a rat, mouse, or lizard whenever she feels like it, is beyond me.

Being claimed by a cat only makes me want a dog (I miss Andy).  Having a cat claim my yard as her own, certainly won't help me at tax time.  But it is nice to have someone on permanent vermin duty.  She stays, for now.

"Would You Like Fries to Go With That Burger?"

Real Clear Religion recently ran a column on Ugly Clerical Vestments.  This was my pick.  Can't tell if it is a burger or a "Sloppy Joe."

So, What Does Your Cat Really Think of You?

Several recent studies of the manner in which cats relate to humans (like purring and rubbing on our legs), confirms what some of us have suspected all along . . .  Cats manipulate us, and they really don't like us.

Your Cat Really Doesn't Like You

The Fast Food Object Lesson

No doubt, many of you have seen the clever display in Dr. Jaqueline Vaughn's chiropractic office:  Two Year Old Fast Food. 

To make a point about the importance of good nutrition, Dr. Vaughn purchased a McDonald's cheeseburger and a Taco Bell chicken taco in early 2013.  Despite being left on display in her office for nearly two years, there is no mold, no smell, and no noticeable deterioration in either the burger or the taco.

The intended lesson for Dr. Vaughn's patients is that fast food is bad for you because of the preservative chemicals in it.

But might we draw a completely different conclusion from the same display?  If the chemicals in a McDonald's cheeseburger and a Taco Bell chicken taco have preserved them from decay for nearly two years, why won't those preservatives do the same for those who eat this stuff?  Is it not possible that eating fast food, along with the preservative chemical additives, will actually preserve the innards of those who eat it?  Look what the chemicals did for the cheeseburger and taco!  Not quite the message that Dr. Vaughn intended.

Meanwhile, I am downing my daily nutri-bullet concoction for lunch, wishing it were a McDonald's cheeseburger or a Taco Bell chicken taco.

What Happens to Your Auto Trade-In

Poor Mark Oberholtzer.  In October 2013 he traded in his old truck to AutoNation when he bought a new one.  Who knows how many times his old work truck has traded hands since.  But somehow it ended up in the hands of ISIS as seen in this recent photo.

Mr. Oberholtzer should have removed his "Mark's Plumbing" logo and phone number, because now someone might call needing a truck-mounted Soviet-made ZPU-2 to deal with pesky government forces and attacking aircraft.

Makes me wonder what happened to my 2001 Dodge Caravan.  Wherever it is, and regardless of who has it, I'll bet the transmission is shot and everything in it rattles.

Hal Lindsey Celebrates his 85th Birthday -- But His Mustache Is Only 40

End times prognosticator Hal Lindsey just celebrated his eighty-fifth birthday.  Although his 1969 book Late Great Planet Earth was the first theology book I read on my own as a teenager, I have since moved far away from Lindsey's dispensational premillennialism.

While I am thankful that God has granted Mr. Lindsey long life and good health, I cannot help but wonder if Lindsey is surprised to have lived this long without seeing the Rapture.

One thing has always bothered me about Lindsey--besides his eschatology.  The older he gets, the darker his mustache becomes.  Men usually start to go grey at the chin, temples, and mustache in their late 40's.  Indeed, Lindsey has a fine head of silver hair--the well-earned sign of long life.  But his mustache is a whole generation younger than the rest of him!

One of the most popular posts in the history of this blog was "signs of the end" and the changing colors of Hal Lindsey's mustache (There Will Be Signs on the Earth).  And so as we wish Mr. Lindsey a happy birthday, we wonder, if like the leaves changing color in the Fall, whether or not his mustache will grow old with him--or if it will continue to stay 40.

It's Good to Be the Queen

The Inevitable Consequence of the War Upon Isis

h.t. Andrew Compton